A crayon apron and love.

I’m participating in a 31-day blogging challenge called reverb10, responding to writing prompts that are designed to elicit reflections on 2010, and hopes for 2011. You can find out more about it here. I am challenging myself to respond to each prompt in 15 minutes or less.

Today’s challenge: Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?

 

Making connections with a crayon apron and love.

I have traveled around the U.S. this fall carrying a tiny pink apron with slots to hold crayons, a crayon apron embroidered in white with the name “Donna.”
It all began as an exchange with a stranger named Sheila Quirke, on Facebook. My latest book, “Creative is a Verb: If You’re Alive, You’re Creative,” was coming out, and my publisher was sending me on a book tour.
“I need one of these crayon aprons for this creative tour,” I joked on Facebook, posting a photo from a catalog.
“My daughter had one,” wrote a new Facebook friend named Sheila, “I’ll send it to you, but it will have the wrong name on it because her name was Donna.” I sat, stunned by the offer, having only recently learned that Sheila’s daughter, Donna, had died almost exactly a year before, at four years old. And stunned also because my first name is Donna.
When the package arrived, and I held up the apron, I sobbed. Not only because Sheila had sent it, this talisman of her love, but because it was so very tiny. I have carried it with me on every trip since, telling the story of Donna, finishing my talks about creativity with hers, acknowledging that when we are all that size, we see ourselves as fiercely creative, and once we get bigger, we step back from that creative spirit. I ask my listeners to embody some of Donna’s spirit to reclaim their own creative spark. She continues to travel with me now.
With this little girl’s help, I’ve opened up communities of people who know her story, who will long remember that bright pink apron, who will continue to find inspiration in a tiny spark named Donna. The only materials necessary were an act of generosity on her mother’s part, the serendipity that brought us together on the internet, a bright pink apron, and a little girl who loved to dance.

From Donna’s obituary comes a deeper picture of a full, if short, life: Donna Lubell Quirke Hornik, age 4, of Chicago, died peacefully at home surrounded by her loving and heartbroken parents, Sheila Quirke and Jeremy Hornik. Donna was diagnosed with cancer at twenty months old. Despite an early prognosis of two to three months, she thrived for ten times that, living joyfully, gracefully. In her too brief life, Donna danced on the stage of the Auditorium Theater, consumed a mountain of macaroni and cheese, worried the winter trees were lonely and cold without their leaves and finally enjoyed the big girl swing all by herself. Donna was singular. She loved three books before bed, her weekly dance class with Miss Shawn, making new friends at Baker Demonstration School, dinosaur bones, the color black and telling her baby brother Jay he was too little to eat eggs. Through her website at CaringBridge.org, Donna’s story touched many.

Donna’s parents are helping other children in need with Donna’s Good Things, a nonprofit organization dedicated to providing joyful opportunities for children facing adversity, be it economic, social, familial, or health related. You can “like” them on Facebook here.

[My husband, John, surprised me by creating this slideshow of Donna’s apron traveling with me this fall. My thanks, Johnny.]

About Patti Digh

Patti Digh is an author, speaker, and educator who builds learning communities and gets to the heart of difficult topics. Her work over the last three decades has focused on diversity, inclusion, social justice, and living and working mindfully. She has developed diversity strategies and educational programming for major nonprofit and corporate organizations and has been a featured speaker at many national and international conferences.

23 comments to " A crayon apron and love. "
  • oh my. you are amazing. that is amazing. and heartbreaking. but those connections, amazing.

  • Sandra B

    and people confront me on why I believe there is no god….

  • Thank you for writing about Donna, Patti. I was flabbergasted when Sheila told me the story of how you came to have the apron and that your first name is Donna. Such a lovely connection.

  • This post brought tears to my eyes. I love how the generosity of a mother has enable her childs story to live on through you. Beautiful.

  • Somehow I had missed the story of Donna’s apron. I saw the mentions on facebook but didn’t know what it was. Beautiful. Thank you Patti for spreading the story of love and creativity.

  • The connections we’re able to make these days are deep…

    I got sober in 2008 with connections I made on the Internet. These people continue to be some of my most trusted confidantes, and I’ve never seen their faces, or touched their skin….

    Someday.

    Online through my blog about getting sober (http://guineveregetssober.com) I met Peggy, who recommended your blog. She turned me on to your book, which I’ve given to friends…

    Also doing reverb10.

    I’m a new blogger, so I’m learning from you. A Big-Sister Blogger. Thanks. –G

  • Sally

    I saw the apron in a catalog the other day, and thought of tiny Donna, and of the evening at Barnes and Noble where I learned of Donna, and of my own tiny people who enrich every single day I get to be with them. Thank you, Patti.

  • My stomach is in knots and my eyes are filled with tears. Thank you for sharing the amazing tale of a sweet girl and her apron filled with love.

  • oh, patti – today, i needed this. what a beautiful story, and the video/song/photos just made me cry. donna’s family is so special, and sharing her crayon apron will only spread the joy and love. life is good.

  • Kim

    Incredible. When I clicked through and saw the beautiful photo of little Donna in her ballet outfit, so full of joy, I cried. Let’s celebrate her life through this movement to do small things for others, to help bring joy to children facing adversity of any kind. Patti, you bring us such amazing people, stories, lives…. You’re a magnet for goodness. Thanks, my friend.

  • I am grateful for the world that the internet, and blogging and FaceBook open up to me – the world would be so much smaller without it. Without it I would never have met Leah (then Piken) Kolidas and I would never have found your books or your blog. This post (and the collage of pictures) is love incarnate. Thank you!

  • This post was so touching. It is an honor to carry Donna’s legacy with you and a gift of her mother for sharing.

  • this is a very touching story. thanks for sharing

  • Wow! This story brought me to tears and I feel goosebumps all over. This is definitely one I will read again and again.

  • The word courage comes to me through my tears, smiles and gratitude for the gifts we receive when we are open to the moment.
    And here is a shout out to the god wink of synchronicity-love that!

  • Bittersweet tears. Thanks Patti, Johnny, Sheila, and most importantly Donna! I am rethinking my strategy big time. Rather letting go of a strategy and letting my dream unfold. Yes that is more accurate. You always bring me back to myself Patti.

  • This was wonderful, and really touched my heart.

  • What a gift. Thank you for sharing. This just goes to show that it’s not a matter of how much time we have on this earth, it’s how we use the time we have. I hope to hear mention of this amazing little girl during your reading/talk tomorrow night in Skokie.

  • Peggy

    So happy you have time to write again. I’ve missed your posts. Miss YOU, missy. Peggy in Yak

  • Marybeth

    Wow… I just kind of stumbled upon this post by accident. I have been reading Donna’s journal on the CaringBridge site and her mother’s daily blogs here in September. Your story was nice, but to see the pictures of Donna’s apron with so many people… Absolutely amazing. Beautiful.

  • I’ve never seen a crayon apron. Isn’t is lovely that this little angel could inspire me to carry my bright colors with me and wear them, so they are ready to draw at a moment’s notice? Thank you Sheila, for sharing so freely. You are an inspiration to do this lovely thing with your grief.

  • […] ask them to remember Donna and share her story with others. You can see a video and read about that here. When I give speeches, I have on my podium or table a glass of water, a watch, and Donna’s […]

  • Crazyclan4

    this is so awesome! 

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