Hold my hand, walk with me, laugh in 17G

NYC Emma and Patti on plane B&W It was a bright, very cold day. After speaking in Miami that morning, I landed at JFK and found a text message from Emma who had landed just minutes before.

We were in different terminals, but she had been met by my editor from Globe Pequot Press, Mary Norris, and was on her way to meet me. It felt like a finely orchestrated scene in a movie, Emma walking toward me with a woman standing behind her in a fine big Russian hat with a copy of Life is a Verb as her "sign."

NYC Mary Norris Emma and me We had just enough time to get into the city, drop our bags at the Roger Smith Hotel, and walk to the famed Algonquin Hotel where we met the publisher and other executives from Globe Pequot Press for the first time. We talked about book projects and book titles and Oprah Winfrey's new network and the vagaries of book sales and awards, all while I was remembering Big Early Moments with Mr Brilliant in that very same bar. The compulsion to channel Dorothy Parker was high.

We walked to the Millenium Hotel for a cocktail party and then to the Books for a Better Life Awards ceremony, authors surrounded by their publishers in anticipation. In a beautiful red theatre, the ceremony began. I didn't have long to wait, since my "category," Inspirational Memoir, was the first announced. A lovely video presentation of the finalists made me feel like Kate Winslet or that nicely talented Meryl Streep but without the jewels, the money, or the gowns. And the winner was Randy Pausch's bestseller, The Last Lecture.

IMG00774 "I don't like his book," my mother had said the week before in defense of her daughter. "It's too depressing."

"Books about fathers dying before the age of 50 and leaving behind young children usually are," I responded.

IMG00762 While my mother (and Mr Brilliant) still fervently believe that Life is a Verb should have won, I could see no other reasonable alternative than this posthumous award to a man whose runaway best seller was not only a tribute to his children and the piece of him they have left, but sparked a renewed focus on living for enormous numbers of people. And as my friend Jeff so gently said when he heard the news, "'Only chance' trumps 'first chance,' I suppose." And so I watched Pausch's widow accept the award and knew in that moment that there had always been only that outcome.

(During the awards ceremony I vowed, solely on the basis of his achingly beautiful acceptance speech, to read Daniel Gottlieb's LEARNING FROM THE HEART: Lessons on Living, Loving, and Listening)

Mostly, the awards ceremony was a fantastic excuse to spend a few days in New York with Emma.

IMG00750 We walked, and walked some more. We toured Pratt as a possible college for Emma (WHAT? SO SOON? NO!) and found a NYC mecca for Emma called Kinokuniya, a three-floor Japanese bookstore. NYC Emma at Kinokuniya2 NYC 37days lunch We ate lunch with fantastic 37days readers at Lily's Restaurant and were surprised by a bottle of champagne from the manager! We saw a breathtaking play, "August: Osage County" that made us feel better about any tiny family dysfunction we might have (just sayin') and walked some more. We found the datebook I so desired. And then we got up at the crack of dawn and headed home in seats 17F and G.

Thanks for all your good wishes for the Books for a Better Life awards. It sounds trite, but it's very true–I am so honored to have been one of the finalists with this little book that came so deeply out of my heart for these two girls, one of whom sat holding my hand during the ceremony. IMG00794 IMG00791

About Patti Digh

Patti Digh is an author, speaker, and educator who builds learning communities and gets to the heart of difficult topics. Her work over the last three decades has focused on diversity, inclusion, social justice, and living and working mindfully. She has developed diversity strategies and educational programming for major nonprofit and corporate organizations and has been a featured speaker at many national and international conferences.

15 comments to " Hold my hand, walk with me, laugh in 17G "
  • hooray … such a happy post ….. glad you had a grand trip ….

  • It’s a shame that they couldn’t have called a tie. While both books touched me in different ways, and both changed me, only yours made me get off my ass and live differently. Not drastically, because that’s just not how I make changes anymore; but slowly, deliberately and with an accountability I didn’t feel so much before. As an aside, is that a pretzel or some sort of Breadzilla? Impressive!!

  • Amanda

    So sweet, so gracious, so real. Just like LIAV.

  • you are a lucky woman. and you already know why.

    can you tell me why the fascination with Kinokuniya??? does she have some fascination with things Japanese??? can I hook you up with anything on this end???

    by the way, in your aging process photos, there are one or two that look EXACTLY (freakily so) like my sister. I thought so. Later, with no clues from me, she looked , and she noticed the similarity , too. The long , straight hair, parted .. and those funny funny glasses in the 70’s.

  • Ramona

    I was rooting for you, but I too saw that it had to be the way it turned out. Your friend put it so eloquently,”‘Only chance’ trumps ‘first chance.”
    Here’s to many more chances for you, and remember that whether or not you won the award, you have changed lives and are making the world a better place. And I thank you!
    Ramona

  • Ah – The Algonquin Hotel – what a perfect way to start your trip and introduce Emma to NYC. Lots of wonderful mother-daughter memories.

  • Patti…

    I just finished reading this lovely post of yours and tears are still falling down my face. It’s 9am Sunday morning on the West Coast and as I sit and finish my breakfast of oatmeal, toast and coffee, with quiet music playing in the background, I am suddenly aware of how much I miss my mom.

    Normally it’s your words that inspire and delight me, but today, it’s the beautiful photographs of you and your daughter on the plane that have moved me. The way in which you’re looking at Emma makes my heart swell. It’s been a good long while since my mother and I have spent some yummy quality time together; time to relax, time to play, time to just be in each other’s company. It’s time for her and I to enjoy a weekend away with one another. I’m calling her today to ask when we can have that weekend. Thanks, Patti. (:

    I’m so looking forward to meeting you in May in Cinncinnati. Speaking of Flying Pigs…how goes your training for the BIG event? Enjoy your Sunday playing Tooth Fairy!

    Cheers,
    Lisa

  • I haven’t been able to read Randy’s Pauch’s book yet because…well…a friend of mine just passed away at 39 from cancer, leaving behind a wife and infant son. In December. So…yeah…a little too raw right now.

    but I absolutely agree that his message is so completely inspiring…and yours mirrors it in the fact that your focus is to embrace the moments, appreciate it all and meet another person’s eyes.

    I adore the photos of you and emma so much. That kid of yours has such depth in her eyes.

    many blessings!

  • More wonderful philosophy about life…winning, losing…and how to accept and understand how we feel about it — how we choose to feel about it.

  • Miss Marshall

    What a wonderful relationship you and Emma have, and she is breathtakingly beautiful. And interesting. Really interesting. As for the awards…I’ll say it again…the book was nominated in the wrong category. Really.

  • jylene

    this is a wonderful post! it sounds like you had a great trip.
    i hope my daughter and will visit NYC together someday…

  • Janey Davis

    You are such a winner! And steping back and
    appreciating someone else wining is not loosing. Lucky Emma to have such a role model. Lucky you to be able to share such moments with you daughter. My one and only trip to N.Y. was with my son! Lovely memory!Janey

  • Aaw, you are a lovely pair, you and Emma. You make me even more thankful than I already am for my own lovely daughter.

  • So wonderful, Patti. Congratulations on, well, just everything. xoxo

  • bounces in ! I’ve been to that bookshop. Did you go upstairs and find the really weird genre of books made by pet owners of cute photographs of the life of their pet?

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