mother’s day is hard for me.

2014-05-08 18.39.58-1To be honest, Mother’s Day is tough for me.

I talked to my mom yesterday when she called, and again today. It is a weekend that weighs heavy on us, even as much as we celebrate our own mothers, and our own children who made us mothers.

“We took him to the hospital 34 years ago yesterday,” she said. “It doesn’t seem possible it’s been 34 years,” she continued.

“It sure doesn’t,” I said.

Daddy died on that Mother’s Day weekend in 1980. We found Mother’s Day cards he had written to my mom in the trunk of his car after he died. These anniversaries have a weightiness to them, like full storm clouds just before a big rain.

Tomorrow is the 34th anniversary of his death. I don’t think my mother ever returned or recovered from that. I returned, but I didn’t recover either.

The world is so, so full of transient beauty. Perhaps those words cannot exist except in direct proximity to one another.

 

About Patti Digh

Patti Digh is an author, speaker, and educator who builds learning communities and gets to the heart of difficult topics. Her work over the last three decades has focused on diversity, inclusion, social justice, and living and working mindfully. She has developed diversity strategies and educational programming for major nonprofit and corporate organizations and has been a featured speaker at many national and international conferences.

3 comments to " mother’s day is hard for me. "
  • Oh love and pain are braided strands of one mystery.

  • Sarah

    Mother’s Day is hard for me because I miscarried two babies in the last three years. I am not going to have the chance to be a biological mom and it is heart-breaking for me. I grieve about it every day, but Mother’s Day feels like hell on earth.

  • Kevin

    My mother died on Mother’s Day that very same weekend, 34 years ago. I went home, threw away the Mother’s Day card and graduated from college the next weekend.

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