The Horse Lesson: 50@50

May 17, 2009 in 50@50
0 patti horse528 See the thing is that if you want (or need) to be publicly shamed into actually doing what you said you'd do, best to tell everyone you know and don't yet know. That way, a few months into it, several dozen people can write you an email and say "whaddup? what's with the 50@50 you promised? how's that goin'?"

Truthfully? If I hadn't told all of you and even enlisted 13 of you to join me in Cincinnati for the recent halfathon, I wouldn't have gone. Hadn't prepared, had left it to the last minute like everything else, couldn't find my thigh muscles, wouldn't have gone. But I DID tell you, you DID come, I WAS there, I GOT my medal, and I'm wearing it everywhere for the rest of my life.

So, when people started emailing to ask how my 50@50 plan was working, I knew I needed to check in with that list and see how I was doing.

I'd give myself a "B."

1. Learn to run (walk/crawl) a half-marathon (the LIAV MaraTeam!) – Done! Training for the next one!
2. Learn to knit Thanks to Maxine, done! Practicing!
3. Learn to carve a rubber stamp
4. Learn to speak Spanish (and re-learn Chinese so I can talk to my friend Ye Gongxian who I've recently reconnected with after 25 years…) Learning Spanish from Tessie. So far I can order a quesadilla with french fries in Spanish. With orchata to drink.
5. Learn to speak Sign Language
6. Learn to trapeze (please, someone find Sam Keen and talk him into teaching me)
7. Learn to eat vegan more imaginatively – In process! Veganomicon cookbook totally rocks!
8. Learn to document my 50th year in art (I'm creating an art project using 3"x3" squares of paper, one of which will be decorated each day this year to document the ebb and flow of this year, the colors of my days, an art journal, of sorts) – In process!
9. Learn to firewalk
10. Learn digital storytelling – Done!
11. Learn to make podcasts and learn how to download tunes onto the iPod that I don't know how to operate, dear god how hard could this be?
12. Learn how to write poetry or at least appreciate it more (starting with Ted Kooser's brilliant book on the same…) Read the book!
13. Learn to make the perfect loaf of bread
14. Learn to make a mug on a pottery wheel, glaze it, and fire it
15. Learn to write a play
16. Learn to say no to things I really don't want to do, that make my stomach ache the moment I say yes, those things. Doing really well!
17. Learn to say yes to things that scare me but thrill me. (This does NOT include skydiving, Emma. Just in case you were wondering. It also does not include bungee jumping or other things having to do with heights).
18. Learn to lose 50@50. There. I've said it. The walking really helps. So does journaling what I eat, and when, and under what circumstances. Stressed? Reach for food. Happy? Reach for food. Bored? Reach for food. Good learning, there.
19. Learn to see food as fuel, not as comfort, celebration, or avoidance. In process. The walking helps.
20. Learn to speak my truth. Working on speaking it in a way that can be heard. This requires not making comparisons between my truth and the truth of others.
21. Learn how to manage money. Learn why I avoid it. Signed up for a "heart of money" course that starts in June.
22. Learn what wellness really is. Not a weight goal, but wellness. Wellness statement written.
23. Learn what I am yearning for, beneath the surface of what I say I want. Working on this, closer.
24. Learn to cook palak paneer like Heritage India in Washington, D.C.
25. Learn how to get organized and stay organized.
26. Learn how to get 8 hours of sleep every night.
27. Learn how to create an e-newsletter. Done!
28. Learn how to set up an artists' co-op store online.
29. Learn how to sew well enough to make little cloth pouches.
30. Learn what Feynman had to say.
31. Learn from Richard Powers about writing by reading everything he has written.
32. Learn where Johnny Depp lives. Okay, I'm just kidding. I already know that.
33. Learn to stop making excuses.
34. Learn to stop deflecting from what is mine to do in the world by doing everything else BUT that. Closer, closer.
35. Learn to make the perfect cup of tea.
36. Learn really basic Photoshop skills like how to paste my head on the bodies of people like Gabrielle Reece or that undeserving twiglike French woman that Mr Depp hangs out with.
37. Learn how to change gears on my bike and how to fix the chain when it slips off.
38. Learn to make roti and how to peel a mango (that has bothered me for years)
39. Learn to turn off the computer.
40. Learn to listen more fully.
41. Learn to assume positive intent.
42. Learn to drop the barrier between art and work. Break through!
43. (Re)learn how to kayak.
44. Learn to meditate. My friend Sid is going to teach me.
45. Learn how to ride horses. They scare me. FIRST LESSON TODAY!
46. Learn to play the guitar.
47. Learn to change the tire on a car, something that would have come in real handy on that 21 degree morning on I-85 South on November 20, 2008.
48. Learn what is mine to do in the world – and, more importantly – what is NOT mine to do.
49.
50.

Number 45.

The last time I was on a horse…well, that's a picture of the big occasion adorning this post. So, it's been a while.

Today's the day. 1:30pm Eastern. Me and a big muscled animal with very large scary teeth.

The others of my 50@50 will come.

About Patti Digh

Patti Digh is an author, speaker, and educator who builds learning communities and gets to the heart of difficult topics. Her work over the last three decades has focused on diversity, inclusion, social justice, and living and working mindfully. She has developed diversity strategies and educational programming for major nonprofit and corporate organizations and has been a featured speaker at many national and international conferences.

14 comments to " The Horse Lesson: 50@50 "

  • Reply
    Carolynn
    May 17, 2009 AT 1:25AM

    Uh oh…now you’ve done it! Once you’ve started horseback riding you won’t want to stop. That’s certainly been my experience. It’s the greatest place to practice being totally present and is, therefore, one of the best ways to unplug and beat stress.

    I’ll dig around and see if I can locate my No Fail Bread recipe. The name says it all. Scrumptious AND easy.

  • Reply
    Kim Mailhot
    May 17, 2009 AT 7:48AM

    Your list is wonderful and brave and honest, Patti. Do you realize how that honesty is a gift that inspires ? I hope so !
    Many of your items would be on my own 43@43 list – especially some of more universal things like listening more carefully, learning to see food as fuel, or finding out what is mine to do. I am inspired to write my own – an honest one like yours – and then find the courage to share it, like you did ! That accountability factor is something, ain’t it ?
    Horses are magical creatures with keen sensitivity to emotions and to love. Put that in your saddle when you ride the big muscles, big-toothed beast, okay ? Good luck !

  • Reply
    Melissa
    May 17, 2009 AT 10:25AM

    Good on you, Patti Digh! Do you know your horse’s name yet? :)

  • Reply
    Gwyn
    May 17, 2009 AT 11:04AM

    Hi Patti! I am so happy for you. I turned 50 this past November, and have a very similar list of goals. I promised I would volunteer at a local horse rescue farm, which would lead to riding horses. I have the application, have it filled out since my birthday….hmmm Tuesday would be a good day to go up there. They are closed Monday. Wishing you a most excellent lesson, and horse time!!!

    HUGS from PA

  • Reply
    Lauren Gaw
    May 17, 2009 AT 11:12AM

    Dear Patti, I would like to help you with some of your 50@50. Perpahs I should do a 25@25, especially since my birthday is on the 25th of July!

    Ok I will help you or at least direct you to someone who can help you on some of these.

    I will post in the coming days, not right now because I am going to make some artful lunch and a celebration out of food. I digress.

    I will help with number 6, 29, and 36. I can teach you how to play guitar hero, but thats not a real guitar and may be cheating on number 46

    Happy Sunday!

  • Reply
    jylene
    May 17, 2009 AT 1:42PM

    as always, you are an inspiration to me!

  • Reply
    smallbluebird
    May 17, 2009 AT 4:13PM

    Ride ’em cowgirl!

  • Reply
    Jean
    May 17, 2009 AT 9:13PM

    I’m trying to figure out how to help you with #5. Learn to Speak Sign Language. I’m a professional sign language interpreter, after all.

    Let me think on it a while. :)

  • Reply
    Kathy
    May 18, 2009 AT 11:26AM

    A strong “B”, at that! Look at all these new things that you’re learning; I especially love all the learning that you are doing about learning. It never stops, but your learnings about learning are just impressive –

    1. When the horse is 25 feet tall and you have decided to ride it, laugh uncontrollably and get on.
    2. When you know you won’t really walk/run for 13.1 miles unless someone watches you every step of the way, enlist co-walker/runners.

    I’m waiting for #47: The Pioneer Spirit Learning – “No Time Like the Present. In the Rain. With No Prior Experience. How Hard Can it Be?”

  • Reply
    Franky
    May 18, 2009 AT 1:03PM

    Good for you Patti – I know you’ll love horseback riding; they really are the gentlest of creatures!

  • Reply
    dancing kitchen
    May 18, 2009 AT 5:10PM

    Hey Sugar…
    #13 is artisan bread in 5 minutes a day. I promise!!
    ~Cindy

  • Reply
    Kathi
    May 20, 2009 AT 1:02PM

    I love your 50@50! What a wonderful, honest, brave list. In my teens I started a “BID” list (Before I Die) of things I really want to do at some point in my life; I’m accomplishing more of them since I turned 50 and add to it all the time…still have a huge list to go (that’s what happens when you start it early and learn more about life and the world as you grow older)! You’ve inspired me to rename my list more creatively…LOL.

    Re your #6…I just learned that Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY is offering a trapeze week in July for beginners and advanced folks…not Sam Keen, but something to consider: a week-long workshop titled “Flying Trapeze: An Adventure in Self-Discovery.”

    Visit: http://www.eomega.org/omega/workshops/12d5a1b3bb2c4bb69cedfc69ef3c5d34/ …and if you don’t know Omega, explore a little…I think you’d like it there.

    By the way, couldn’t attend ASAE’s Great Ideas this year…so sorry I missed you! Love your blog…

  • Reply
    Suzanne Deal-Fitzgerald
    May 23, 2009 AT 10:27PM

    Before you get too comfy with the horse thing, I’d like to impart my #1 Rule about Horses.

    DO NOT STAND BEHIND HORSE.

    (Contrary to a previous comment, horses aren’t always the gentlest of creatures. Of course, in hindsight, the last time I stood behind a horse, I wasn’t the smartest…)

  • Reply
    Sally
    May 27, 2009 AT 12:21AM

    How amazing and inspiring you are, thank you!

    Here are a couple of ideas to help you with 12 & 13:

    Bread (I promise it’s easy and has the most amazing crust): http://www.nytimes.com/2006/11/08/dining/081mrex.html

    Poetry: Read anything by BIlly Collins, to write poetry try “Poem Crazy: Freeing Your Life With Words” by Susan G. Wooldridge

    I hope this can give you some inspiration and aid just as you’ve given to me.

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